Archive | August, 2011

Our Idiot Brother

31 Aug


Over the weekend, I saw Our Idiot Brother, a movie that was far sweeter and funnier than anything I’ve seen this summer (and I saw the Werner Herzog cave painting documentary!). I love family comedies more than just about anything. You know, like The Corrections. That was a comedy, right? Don’t even tell me it wasn’t, because what was that scene with the talking turd if not comedy? Either way, Our Idiot Brother surprised me by including very few crude jokes. Yes, we did see the back of Steve Coogan’s balls, crude as they may be, but other than that, it was really quite pleasant. No one had semen in their hair, or got hit in the face with a condom, or whatever sort of thing the kids think is funny these days. I appreciate a dirty joke as much as the next gal, but it was nice to see a movie where all of the characters (EXCEPT STEVE COOGAN) were clothed most of the time.

Paul Rudd’s character was a real rarity in film: an optimistic character who isn’t mocked. Most of the comedy hinged on his free-spirited, relaxed behavior around people who are more uptight or motivated or mean, but the film never mocked him. The movie opens with him selling pot to a uniformed cop, but at no point did I think, “Get a load of this dummy!” In a lot of ways, Our Idiot Brother reminded me of an 80’s comedy, maybe something like What About Bob. Actually, exactly like What About Bob. Let’s all rewatch What About Bob this week, everybody!

This movie had something else I always love in a film: sisters! I love watching movies with sisters (or nuns, or houses for unwed mothers, or all-girls boarding schools) because that’s an experience I never had and it all seems so wonderful and mystical. Does it involve less farting? I bet it does. I bet nobody farts at the dinner table when you have sisters! Probably your sister does not say, “Wait a second, did you hear that?” and then fart as soon as you start listening intently.

Watch this movie. Think about what it would be like to have sisters. Look at Steve Coogan’s balls. You’ll love it.

Memories of Celine Dion’s “It’s All Coming Back to Me Now”

31 Aug

1. A girl sang it at an elementary school talent show. My mom told me she thought it was “a little inappropriate,” and at the time I didn’t get it. Um, it’s Celine, Mom. This song is a modern classic. To be fair, she was kind of right. This song is about breakup sex, right?

2. As a fourth grader, I was really into Celine Dion. I got her CD as a birthday gift and brought it into school. My friends and I pored over the liner notes and made one of our teachers define the word “seduce” for us. She said it was when you tried to make someone fall in love with you. Close enough.

3. My friend Dan once recorded his voice mail message to the tune of this song. “Baby, baby, baby/When you call me like this/And I don’t answer like that/Leave a message at the beep/And I’ll get right back to you noooooow.” He changed it when we stopped being kids who never had to deal with professional phone calls.

4. A few minutes ago when I saw this video for the first time in years and remembered how amazing it is.

Lady Inspiration: Emma Stone

30 Aug

“You’re a human being, you live once and life is wonderful, so eat the damn red velvet cupcake.”– Emma Stone in Glamour

Typically I try not to post a lot about white girls in their early 20’s offering up charming platitudes, because this is not a Tumblr comprised solely of pictures of bicycles, cupcakes, and Audrey Hepburn with her pet deer. But there’s just something about Emma Stone. I think she’s the female Ryan Gosling: a really attractive person who somehow also manages to seem interesting and smart. In this interview, she reveals that she was a “spelling bee kid” and her favorite movie is The Jerk. Also, this image of her at a Baskin Robbins with Taylor Swift kinda made me fall in love. This is my exact expression when trying to choose an ice cream flavor: serious, intense, overwhelmed.

And this is my expression after I get ice cream, like, “Hell yes I have ice cream, now get out of my way so I can eat it.”

Emma Stone: she’s just like us!

Words People Have Used to Describe My Appearance

30 Aug

Asian
Unique
Exotic
Almost Asian
Different
Vaguely Ethnic
“Indian or something”

My Favorite Thing In the World

29 Aug

In which Diana Ross wears a number of sexed-up African outfits while dancing frenetically, all hips and elbows. The dancing, the music, Diana’s truly otherworldly beauty, and the weirdness of the stills all add up to a completely hypnotic viewing experience.

If you watch this entire video and then want nothing more than to watch it again, you are either my new best friend or my soul mate. Or my brother.

Lydia the Queen of Tattoo

29 Aug

While listening to All Songs Considered’s episode on Songs That Make You Feel Good, I was reminded of Lydia the Tattooed Lady. No offense to Groucho, but his version isn’t the one that makes me smile. That honor is reserved for none other than Kermit the Frog. Lexie and I watched a lot of the Muppet Show as kids, and this is one song I remember playing often. Lydia’s dancing is pretty suggestive for a puppet, right? Now there’s an inspirational lady.

Seriously, though, give that All Songs Considered episode a listen. Unless you hate feeling good, in which case I think you’re reading the wrong blog anyway.

Manic Pixie Douche Bag: Explained

29 Aug

As far as I’m concerned, the AV Club’s singular greatest contribution to popular culture was defining the Manic Pixie Dream Girl. A Manic Pixie Dream Girl is any female character who waltzes through the film all carefree and lighthearted and fun, a character who usually has no backstory and whose only real purpose in the film is to show the central (male, uptight, neurotic, deep) character how to love life. You know them: Natalie Portman in Garden State, Kirsten Dunst in Elizabethtown, Mila Kunis in Forgetting Sarah Marshall…any film where the female lead is not so much a strong woman as a background-less vision of zaniness.

But what about when the Manic Pixie Dream Girl is a guy? That, my friends, is why I’ve coined a never-before-used term: Manic Pixie Douche Bag.

It came to me during one of the many, many episodes of Gilmore Girls Lexie and I watched last week. When Rory first meets Logan, he can best be described as a fun-loving, work-averse scamp (if we are using hobo language, that is. And I always am). Logan serves the same purpose to Rory as those legions of MPDGs do for all the uptight, depressed men-children; he livens her up. Sneaking into dining halls, jumping off of things with umbrellas, stealing boats…you know, just lovin’ life! He’s not into commitment, relationships, or abiding by the law.

After they jump off this…structure?…Rory says, “That was a once-in-a-lifetime experience!” To which Logan breathlessly replies, “Only if you want it be.” Classic Manic Pixie Douche Bag. Naturally, Rory ends up calling Loralei to ask if she doesn’t take enough risks. This is what the Manic Pixie Douche Bag does to your mind: he makes you think that if you’re not constantly putting your life in danger, you’re just not living.


“Hey Ace, let me blindfold you to take you on a weird, overnight camping trip.”


“Hey Ace, let’s speak dismissively of our bartenders/people who have less money than us.”


“Hey Ace, let’s make out even though we’re both wearing tuxes.”


“Hey Ace, let’s impulsively get married and move to California and something something something avocado tree.”

Manic Pixie Douche Bags…THE WORST.

A Confession

28 Aug

Do you ever do this thing where you bake something for your boyfriend (or sister, or mom, or next door neighbor, or coworker, WHATEVER)? And you say things like, “I saw this recipe and thought of you!” But, in all actuality, you really just wanted an excuse to make something that you thought sounded good and you didn’t want to keep the whole pan in your apartment because I think we all know what happens when you keep an entire pan of dessert in your apartment?

I have certainly never been there.

Enjoy those Chocolate Peanut Butter Rice Krispie Treats, H! These were a perfect post-pizza dessert. I’m a big proponent of the salty/sweet flavor combination (is there anyone out there who isn’t?). H. initially balked at the addition of peanut butter, but I followed through with the original recipe’s vision because I do what I want and it was clearly for the best. You should probably all just make me your girlfriend. I enjoy pizza nights, long walks to the wine store, romantic Netflixing, and being headstrong when it comes to Rice Krispie treat preparation. I will use you as an excuse to make desserts and you’ll awaken most mornings to a bag of donuts. Think about it.

Happy Weekend!

26 Aug

I hope you’re all staying safe and keepin’ it cool this weekend. Maybe go see Our Idiot Brother. You’ll laugh, I promise! Maybe don’t eat too much popcorn because your boyfriend got a great Groupon deal on a movie ticket/popcorn/soda combo. Not that I made that mistake or anything.

Enjoy this wonderful clip of the lovely Joan Rivers and Miss Piggy from one of my favorite movies ever, The Muppets Take Manhattan. Maybe watch THIS movie this weekend. But I’m serious about not eating too much popcorn. Don’t do it!

Lady Inspiration: Janeane Garofalo

26 Aug



I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.

I really love Janeane Garofalo. In high school when I really identified with her saracastic outsider-ness…and also her look.

Now one of the things I appreciate about her is her honesty. She is totally open about getting Botox and losing weight in order to get more work in Hollywood. Also, did you know that Cameron Crowe offered her the female lead role in Jerry Maguire if she lost weight? She lost weight and found out Renee Zellweger already had the role anyway. CAMERON CROWE, get it together.

Of course, the best thing about Janeane Garofalo is her comedy. You can see her stand up special, If You Will, on Netflix. Or just enjoy one of my favorite Ben Stiller Show Sketches, the B Minus Time Traveler.

“Didn’t you study American History?” “Yeah, but I wasn’t a freak about it!”

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