I was so pissed as a six-year-old that I had a child’s body–not because I wanted to have sex; I just wanted to be a woman. And I love being a woman. I love my bras, I love my tampons–I literally just love being a woman. – Jenny Slate in Bust’s Oct/Nov issue
Sometime soon I’ll have to do a post about how much I love Jenny Slate. I mean, I love her with a crazy, ridiculous passion because she is so cool and so fearless and so funny. But she is so silly, also, because no one loves tampons! No one. Maybe tampon companies, because do you know how much those things cost? Like a million dollars. In the pie chart that is my monthly budget, tampons are taking up a much greater percentage than I would like. I would like for them to take up NO percentage, because I would like for the government to give me them for free. But that’s whole different post. Jenny Slate, yay!
!!!!!!! [BxB] [EPISODE 3.03] !!!!!!! from Dean Fleischer-Camp on Vimeo.
I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.
I really love Janeane Garofalo. In high school when I really identified with her saracastic outsider-ness…and also her look.
Now one of the things I appreciate about her is her honesty. She is totally open about getting Botox and losing weight in order to get more work in Hollywood. Also, did you know that Cameron Crowe offered her the female lead role in Jerry Maguire if she lost weight? She lost weight and found out Renee Zellweger already had the role anyway. CAMERON CROWE, get it together.
Of course, the best thing about Janeane Garofalo is her comedy. You can see her stand up special, If You Will, on Netflix. Or just enjoy one of my favorite Ben Stiller Show Sketches, the B Minus Time Traveler.
“Didn’t you study American History?” “Yeah, but I wasn’t a freak about it!”
While we were in New York this weekend, we saw a free show in Williamsburg (aka The Handlebar Mustache Capital of the World) with Eugene Mirman, Jim Gaffigan, Kristen Schaal, Todd Barry, Patton Oswalt, They Might Be Giants, and a monsoon-like rainstorm. The last one was not on the bill, but it showed up anyway. I’ve just grown to accept that every outdoor event I attend will take place in a torrential downpour (see: The Flaming Lips at the Nelsonville Music Festival).
We tried to hide under Lauren’s blanket, but that didn’t last long.
Kristen Shaal was the highlight of the evening. While she was on stage, I barely even noticed that my jeans were so completely soaked that they weighed about twenty pounds. “I’m gonna go ahead and find Amelia Earhart,” she said. “Because every day that goes by, I fear the worst for her.” She went on to dance to Irene Cara’s “What a Feeling” from Flashdance, a movie with which I share a deep spiritual connection.
Shortly after her performance, Lauren and I reached our breaking point/Thai food point and left to get Pad Thai and Thai beer. We got back in time to catch the end of TMBG’s set. All in all, a delightful (and drenched) evening.
Pictures from The L Magazine and H.
Here’s yet another reason why Chelsea Peretti is my favorite comedian.
I’ve been busy lining up a summer of lady comedy, and if all goes according to plan, I’ll be seeing Kristen Schaal soon! I feel very close to her because she’s also a curly haired lady with a “unique” voice. Here’s her being funny:
And here she is being interviewed by Nylon. I love these Nylon interviews because they are always edited so strangely.
“I look like someone from a traveling circus, but, like, a sweet traveling circus.”
“I’m really into Beyonce today.”
“Well I love Tori Amos, and no one’s going to take that away from me.”
Tig Notaro’s album comes out in a few months! Who’s excited? I’m excited!
I don’t know a lot about Megan Amram, other than her funny McSweeney’s list and the fact that she was on Julie Klausner’s delightful podcast. I feel like this video gets across everything we need to know, namely that she is hilarious.
“Women who get offended when people say that women aren’t funny probably aren’t funny, you know? Who cares if 90-year-old Jerry Lewis thinks women aren’t funny? It’s fine. It’s endearing, if anything. It’s like if your grandmother’s racist—it’s adorable, it’s fine, it’s subjective.”
It is one of my greatest embarrassments in life that, in high school, I actually said I didn’t think female stand up comedians were funny. Who the hell was I? Apparently, I was possessed by the spirit of Jerry Lewis.
To be fair, in high school I read almost exclusively male authors, tried to write like a dude, and pretended I liked shitty music in order to impress guys. I wasn’t exactly “empowered,” to say the least. Sarah Silverman’s right; if someone says that women aren’t funny, it really doesn’t matter…whether that person is Christopher Hitchens or 16-year-old me.
“This lady did tell me that I looked like a pretty Penny Marshall. That’s Laverne from Laverne and Shirley. Not a pretty girl, really. That’s like telling someone, ‘You look like a gorgeous Whoopi Goldberg.’ Doesn’t exist.”
Chelsea Peretti is my 2nd favorite stand up comedian (1st favorite: Alex, duh). I relate to this joke. Once, one of my friends told me they saw a fat child version of me on the street. THANKS.
“Pam (from The Office) is not intimidating, like one of those women who wears makeup and tailored clothes, and has a good job that she enjoys, and confidence, and an adult woman’s sexuality. There’s nothing scary about Pam, because there’s no mystery; she’s just like the boys who like her; mousy and shy. The ultimate emo-boy fantasy is to meet a nerdy, cute girl just like him, and nobody else will realize she’s pretty. And she’ll melt when she sees his record collection because it’s just like hers….and she’ll never want to go out to a party for which he’ll be forced to comb his hair, or buy grown-up shoes or tie a tie, or demonstrate a hearty handshake, or make eye contact, or relate to people who work in different fields, or to basically act like a man.”
On the serious: Julie Klausner’s book, I Don’t Care About Your Band, actually changed my life. Okay, “changed my life,” sounds a little dramatic, but what I mean is that she changed the way I thought about myself. Her book encouraged me to be a stronger woman, and to not change myself for men in any capacity (whether they be coworkers, friends, or boyfriends). She reminded me that I don’t have to dress like a guy in order to be smart, and if a man doesn’t take me seriously if I’m wearing a dress, then forget him.