If there’s one thing that unites all of us, it’s our love of Gilmore Girls. Young or old, male or female, gay or straight (or middle-aged, transgendered, or bisexual), we can all agree that the witty banter between Loralei and Rory is one of life’s greatest pleasures. Since it is one of my goals to Always Be Talking About Gilmore Girls (ABTAGG), I’m staring a new feature…I’ll be recapping/mostly just rambling about selected episodes of Gilmore Girls. Not in chronological order or any order at all, really, other than just picking my favorites. Also, these aren’t going to be recaps in the traditional sense, in that I’m mostly just going to talk about how much Dean sucks. And I mean, what’s better than a recap of a show that went off the air years ago? You guys, I already feel like we’re all on the same sofa, watching Gilmore Girls together! It’s a really big sofa. Without further ado, A Deep Fried Korean Thanksgiving.
Watching the theme song by myself makes me feel simultaneously comforted (like I’m covered in a warm sepia blanket) and alone, because I miss having a strong male presence to sing the sassy background vocals. If you’ve never experience this, then you’ve never watched GG with Dan or Alex. I feel bad for you.
To start with, we’re treated to one of those classic frenzied-Sookie-in-the-kitchen scenes. She roots through garabage! She points angrily! Then Emily shows up and force-invites Loralei to Thanksgiving dinner like a total guilt-tripping B, even though this will be Loralei and Rory’s fourth Thanksgiving dinner.
So Rory’s at Chilton and, oh my God, Madeline and Louise. I loved them. One of the things GG did right was not villianizing its sluts. They are just fun, kinda dumb/kinda smart sluts. Nothing wrong with that. They’re studying cell biology and Louise says the term “Golgi body” sounds “majorly pornographic.”
You know what else I miss? Bangs-less, awkward, slouching, headbanded, backpacked Rory Gilmore. She’s in fine form here.
Back in Stars Hollow, Kirk’s “thing” this episode is his new cat, also named Kirk. He’s buying supplies at Le Chat Club, and I have to marvel at Stars Hollow’s ability to support such small niche businesses.
Rory: “He’s always been a cat person, he’s just never had a cat.”
At the diner, Luke gives the girls their “Wednesday special,” which is a French dip sandwich, extra fries, and cherry pie. I’d be willing to bet Alexis Bledel has never eaten a French dip sandwich in her entire life. Remember before Luke and Loralei were openly in love and he just had to do things like remember her sandwiches? These were simpler times. Pre-April times. I miss season 3.
Rory’s in her “don’t kiss me in front of Dean” phase with Jess right now. Girl, kiss him while you can. Soon he’ll be off to California and you won’t have a prom date. Jess struts around in this puffy jacket that is probably from Old Navy and they have this exchange:
Rory: “Let’s play it cool.”
Jess: “Hey, I’m Frank at the Sands.”
I’m pretty sure that is the uncoolest, least sexy thing anyone has ever said in the history of the world. God, Jess. Just stop.
Anyway. At Doose’s, Loralei runs into Dean and blah blah blah Dean who cares, I hate Dean. More notable is this exchange between Loralei and Kirk:
Loralei: “Here’s hoping your cat exposes itself to you soon.”
Kirk: “From your mouth to God’s ears.”
At the Kim family’s Thanksgiving, we are treated to the lovely Dave Rygalski, played by Adam Brody. I miss Dave so much. Zach was fine and all, but what happened with him was nowhere near as good as anything that could’ve happened with Dave.
At Sookie’s Thanksgiving, Jackson and a group of dudes we’ve never seen before and will never see again are deep frying the turkey, which is unremarkable except that one guy says, “Where’s Jackson? Is he on the pot or something?” The subtitles changed this to, “Is he on the pod or something?” which I actually prefer.
At Luke’s Thanksgiving dinner (which is CLEARLY the best), Luke makes everyone give thanks “that we’re not Native Americans who got their land stolen in exchange for small pox infested blankets.” Gettin’ mad political up in this diner, Luke.
Emily’s Thanksgiving is straight-up terrible, which I mostly say because I hate any sort of meal that isn’t served buffet style, and I mean that 100% seriously. Any meal where you have to pass dishes around makes me nervous. Plus, it’s just a bunch of weird old people.
I would still go to this dinner, if only to hang out with Edward Hermann, light of my life, fire of my loins. Pretty sure Nabokov wrote that line about him, right?
I think the Dave and Lane story is just as heart-fluttery as any romance involving Loralei or Rory. Dave strategically leaves his Bible behind so Lane can run it out to him, and after he says, “Wow, you run really quiet,” he kisses her to the tune of “The Man Who Sold the World.” Is it weird that I find this super romantic? High school me would’ve died for something like this. Probably literally.
Back at Sookie’s, the stress of deep frying drove her to drink. Drunk Sookie is kind of like if Bill Cosby and Liza Minelli had a baby, and then that baby was an alcoholic.
The clip isn’t embeddable, but it’s here.
At the end of the episode, Dean tries to act super threatening to Jess, but I can’t think of anything less threatening. All I can think of is Dean’s stupid facial hair he grows later on. UGH. DEAN.
The episode ends as Loralei and Rory walk home to some strumming guitars while Kirk sleeps in the gazebo, beautifully decorated in leaves and (as always) twinkle lights.
And we all feel comforted. THE END.